Do We Heal Our Clients?
This article in Psychology Today touched on the wounded healer. All of us are wounded in some way whether we admit or not. What brings one into the healing arts be it wholistic, medical or psychological comes from our desire to help another heal. Sometimes from knowledge about why we are who we are and the fact we did the work and healed ourselves from woundedness or we believe in helping others we can heal them and then heal ourselves.
This is provided for your perusal and I don’t have the answers. You have the answers within yourself on why you choose that profession and mission in life.
Read, think upon it and find your answers.
10 Tips For Healing Your Woundedness So You Can Help Others
- Identify the wound. Ask yourself what wound you seek to heal by ministering to others.
- Liberate your patients. It’s not fair to depend on your patients to give you a sense of self-worth, identity, inherent value, or sense of accomplishment. If you need therapy, spiritual counseling, or some other kind of guidance to help you address your personal issues, get help.
- Be mindful of how your woundedness can bleed into your patients. If they feel they must please you in order to help you heal your own wounds, they will be focused on YOU, rather than focusing on their own self-healing.
- Be aware of your power. When patients seek help, they are vulnerable and easy to influence. This can be a drug for those whose wounds revolve around feelings of powerlessness or lack of control. DO NOT take advantage of your power.
- Own your shit and take responsibility for your own healing. Make a plan to deal with your issues. Check in with your Inner Pilot Light and ask yourself what you need in order to heal the primary wound that may have led you to enter a healing profession.
- Beware of projection. Your patients are not your alcoholic mother, your abusive ex-husband, or your vicious boss.
- Don’t be afraid of loving your patients. I know some people get all nutso about transference and all that crap. But love is the most healing gift you can offer your patients – and yourself.
- Avoid being a control freak. WAY too many people enter the healing professions in order to feel a sense of control. (Think of the bossy, screaming surgeon in the OR, ordering around the scrub tech and the nurse.) If you have control issues, deal with them in other ways. Your job is not the place to heal those wounds.
- Be a grown up. If you have Mommy issues or childhood traumas you haven’t addressed, face your junk. But don’t become the wounded child you once were. Don’t act out.
- Practice radical acts of self-love. If you know you’re enough, just the way you are, if you treat yourself like the precious child you once were, if you give yourself a break, care for your body, forgive yourself for your failings, and otherwise love and adore yourself, you won’t need your patients to feed your ego, and you will free them to focus on their own healing. Plus, you will be much better suited to care for them and nurture their optimal health and wellness.
Nobody sets out to hurt, abuse, or take advantage of those under their care. But it’s easy to slide into dangerous behavior if we’re not aware of our behavior.
Are You A Wounded Healer?
Does this sound like you or someone you know? Are you a healer—or do you think your physician or other health care provider may have an unexplored wound they’re dealing with. Are you willing to heal your own wounds so you don’t inflict your woundedness upon others?
If you are a patient or a healer committed to changing the way medicine is delivered and recieved, become a Pink Medicine Revolutionary, and I’ll share other tips I’m learning along the way.
And please, tell us your stories and share your insights in the comments below.
Humbly addressing my own wounds,
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Lissa Rankin, MD: Founder of OwningPink.com, Pink Medicine Revolutionary, motivational speaker, and author of What’s Up Down There? Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend and Encaustic Art: The Complete Guide To Creating Fine Art With Wax.